I was officially laid off yesterday. On my birthday… yes, really.

Though I've always pursued my creative endeavors and alternate revenue streams, I've primarily worked in the same industry for the better part of 20 years. For personal reasons, it was an industry that I never wanted into in the first place.

Now that I'm free of it, I've decided that I'm done.

Was I capable at the job? Mostly, yes. In some ways, I was very capable. When I was engaged in tasks that fit my skillset. Managerial positions suit me, not because I have any desire to lead, but because I'm just good at it.

I'm a big believer that people are their happiest in jobs that make them feel productive. Don't make the thing you love your job. Instead, seek employment that properly uses you to both their and your advantage.

Despite their decision to eliminate my position in the company, my previous employer was mostly pretty good. I would recommend them to someone trying to work there. But I was never really happy. In the end, I knew I could do more. I can be more. And that isn't arrogance. One of the reasons I'm effective as a leader is that I'm very good at judging people's strengths and weaknesses. That includes mine. There were some parts of my previous job that were effective uses of me. Other parts of the job were necessary, but they weren't a great use of me.

When we were setting up the online store, my manager wanted me to be there to talk with the company rep so that I could understand what was going to happen. Often during the discussion, I would point out the logistical flaws in the way the online store works as opposed to the way my boss wanted things to work. These were things no one else noticed and my boss acknowledged it.

This is something I’m good at, finding the spanner in the works. It was a good use of me. But then later, I was actually selling parts through the online store. I did the job, but I was no more effective than anyone else would be. The job didn’t require much besides an attention to detail and organization skills.

I want to work. I want to have a job. And I don’t think I’m better than anyone else. Believe me, if I could make a decent living driving (non-CDL), I would. But I need more. I don’t want to hate my job or even mildly tolerate it.

It doesn’t have to be my dream job. It just needs to fit me and make me feel productive.

Well, decent benefits would be nice too.