What Happens in Vegas

Quick note: this post will take the place of today’s Sober October Daily Blog Post. I will occasionally deviate from that format. This is one of 3 pieces I have planned this month, but more may come.

The last time I went to Las Vegas was 2003. I remember loving it. I thought the place was so exciting. Unfortunately, I was broke at the time. There was a lot I didn’t get to do, including staying in a resort hotel.

A week ago, I finally returned and booked a room at the MGM Grand, and man…

What a letdown.

I didn’t hate Las Vegas, but I have to say I was very disappointed. Some of this is because of mistakes that were made on my part. I spent hours watching videos about Las Vegas on youtube to prepare. That turned out to be mostly a waste.

I want to break this down into 3 parts. The things I liked, the things I disliked and what I would do differently if I went back.

THE VENETIAN

What I liked.

Many of the hotels are just as amazing as I remembered. And some are even better. For all the problems I had on this trip, I really want to go back and stay in a couple of these hotels. (More on that later.)

VENETIAN INTERIOR

I loved two things about the MGM Grand, which I stayed in. One was the Lazy River. What a great touch. The other thing was Losers. Losers is a bar on the Broadway strip in Nashville. They have a small satellite location in the Grand, right when you get off the elevator from your room. I loved it. Getting to see live country music every night at the foot of my door was fantastic.

Lastly, the Grand Canyon was only 2 hours away. We were able to rent a car and drive out there for the day. I’ll talk more about this in another post.

THE STRIP MALL WHERE WE ATE AT DAVE’S CHICKEN

What I hated.

The food. I had two meals that were okay. One was a place called Nellie’s Southern Kitchen. The food there was decent, not great. Though I still recommend you check it out if you’re in the MGM Grand. The other place was called Dave’s Hot Chicken. It was a decent little place that serves Nashville Hot Chicken. That was it. Every other meal was either acceptable or outright bad. I expected to be eating really well in Las Vegas.

The Las Vegas Monorail. The monorail itself isn’t bad, but it is somewhat expensive and it is not as convenient as it seems. The places where the monorail connects take forever to get to, especially if you’re on the opposite side of Las Vegas Blvd, such as at The Cosmopolitan, The Bellagio or Caesar’s. But as you go farther North, it gets even worse. At one point, the map suggested the closest location was the LV Convention Center station. We ended up walking through an EXTREMELY sketchy area in the dead of night. We were fine, but I would never do that again.

THE BELLAGIO GARDENS

The Resort fees. The videos I watched mentioned that these hotels all have resort fees, so I figured that was coming. Somehow I was still shocked. I thought the fees would be like $15-20 per night. NOPE. $45. Our rooms cost us almost double what we thought we were paying. Granted, the cost was still reasonable, but I just don’t like the surprise. The manner in which this is presented is moronic. JUST INCLUDE THE RESORT FEE IN THE COST OF THE HOTEL.

The MGM Grand. The room was very nice, but that’s almost all I have to say. The pools had insanely limited hours, so I was only able to go to that lazy river I liked one time. The Grand Buffet was literally the worst buffet I’ve ever had. You could go to a cheap Chinese buffet in the sleaziest part of your hometown and get better quality and more food options. And the resort itself was easily on the lower end of the strip resorts. It wasn’t the worst, or the cheapest looking, but it didn’t impress. Additionally, since you’re positioned on the far end of the strip it takes longer to get to the better resorts and better food options. I may make a ranking of the LV resorts we saw.

VIEW OF THE PARIS HOTEL FROM THE BELLAGIO.

What I will do differently next time.

The best advice I can give is to treat these resorts like a cruise ship, because they are clearly using a cruise ship model. Choose the resort you would be okay with staying in for the whole trip. I would personally either choose The Paris Hotel or the Cosmopolitan. I loved the theming of Paris, but the Cosmo is the coolest hotel I’ve ever seen and it had the best options for everything. I could have spent the whole day in either hotel and just went out on the strip at night.

Take the bus. The Deuce bus goes down the entire strip and its like 8 bucks a day. We would have had an easier time if we had gone that route.

Make reservations before your trip. I really wanted to go to the Wicked Spoon Buffet, but there was no way we were getting in. You needed a reservation in advance. Just for a buffet. If there is a place you really want to try, see if they take reservations.

Lastly, I wouldn’t try to do too much. It really is best to just relax and treat it like a cruise. The highlights of the trip were the lazy river and the Grand Canyon. I wish I would have had the chance to spend more time in both.

THE LOBBY OF THE COSMOPOLITAN